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Who: Bunnycorn
Where: Lepus and Monoceros
When: King’s Year 199, summer
What:

[It’s always a shame to lose one or your hideous abominations of science. They were created not just with long nights and spare parts, but with hopes and dreams. From the “It’s alive!” moment to the first peasant it devours, each monster carries many fond memories of its own uniquely accursed existence.]

[But they’re all dying now; not due to angry mobs or plucky heroes with swords going snickety-snack, but simply poor environmental adaption. You really should have weatherproofed them better. And with Lepus’s primary predators on the decline, a new creature has stepped up to fill the niche: the Lepus lepus, a soft, woobie-eyed bunny with large ears and big feet and sharp, pointy teeth. These days it seems like you can barely walk outside without stepping on one (or two, as there is a reason for their rapid reproduction rate).]

[They’ve invaded the neighboring country of Monoceros as well, but Monoceros has a far greater disaster on their hands. Before they knew it, they had the greatest supply of vinegar in all the land. That’s what happens when all your booze goes bad.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Hmph. If you somehow managed to call away the moons and fire up that old hag in the sky, please do tell.

I don't remember doing anything like that.

Then it wasn't you.

I just worry sometimes.

Sounds like you haven't caused enough trouble, if you have to worry about things you haven't done! If you do it yourself, the satisfaction should make it recognizable enough!

It would give me no satisfaction to bring a plague upon Lepus.

Something like this isn't going to just be effecting us. But you're right, it's really too bad that it does hurt Lepus! It'd be nice if it were just people that deserve it.

Is it possible things like this are happening all over?

There's only one sky, and it's clearly the stupid heat from the Hag that's causing this.

The question is, how do we stop it.

[gives you a flat look of incomprehension]

The weather?

... The rabbits.

They'd make good coats.

And quite a feast.

[still likes sweets the best, meat's kind of eh]

I suppose, we certainly have more than enough for that.

Maybe we can make a whole celebration out of it.

I was just discussing the possibility of a party! With things the way they are, I'm sure the much needed levity would bring in plenty of guests.

We should get some alcohol from Monoceros.

Mm-hmm! And maybe imported from elsewhere, something exotic to draw in a few foreigners!

Yes! Oh, I'm getting excited now.

I'll be sure to see to it that you get an invite, then!

Thank you! I'm honored.